My Side

Assalamu'alaykum Warahmatullah Wabarakatuh,

Today I went to Tennessee Technical University (TTU) in Cookeville, TN which is about an hour and a half drive from Nashville with Dr. Awadh Binhazim, his wife and also Sister Maha Elgenaidi, President and Founder, Islamic Network Group (ING) that based in San Jose, CA. Olive Tree Education and Islamic Network Group were organizing a joint event for Center Stage Presentation at TTU with the topic "Role of Women in Islam: Myths and Realities."

We left Nashville around 4:20pm and Alhamdulillah, arrived safely at Roaden University Center where the event was held around 5:45pm. I gave a hand to help set up the place, and this time I made sure that we have enough copies of the Qur'an translation for our audience who might be interested to read the Qur'an. May Allah open the hearts of those who read His Glorious Book to accept Islam. The event started around 6:00pm.

Dr. Awadh Binhazim gave introduction of Sister Maha, who is the founder and President of the Board of Directors, of the Islamic Networks Group (ING); a commissioner on Lt. Governor Cruz Bustamante's "Commission for One California"; Commissioner on Santa Clara County Human Relations Commission, appointed by Supervisor Jim Beall; Advisor to California's Commission on Police Officers Standards & Training (POST) for hate crimes and cultural diversity training; and former Co-chair and Vice-chair of the Bay Area Hate Crimes Investigators Association (BAHCIA).


From there, Sister Maha continued the presentation. First she gave a brief introduction about Islam, the basics of this religion, the pillars, Muslims in America, and etc. Then, she continued with the topic of Role of Women in Islam. Wallahil'azim, although I have attended some lectures about Women in Islam, I think this time was so far the best. Sister Maha is very knowledgeable, and she understand and delivered the materials very well. She is very eloquent and has full of confidence. Masha Allah, I think she did a very excellent job! I wish Olive Tree Education has a sister who can speak and gives presentation like her.

The lecture took around 50 minutes, then we have questions and answers session. We received a lot of questions and responds from the audience, and I noticed that they were amazed with Sister Maha. Maybe they did not expected a Muslim woman like Sister Maha could give such a great presentation, knew a lot of things and has a lot of knowledge on what she was talking about. After around 30 minutes of questions and answers session, we have a dinner and around 9:00pm, we left TTU campus with a feeling of great accomplishment. Alhamdulillah rabbil 'alameen!


Sorry, this time I couldn't record the lecture, because ING has a strict policy on recording the lecture. I am not even sure whether I can have the slides presentation to share with you guys. But anyway, certainly, if we would like to organize any event on Islam, we should try to consider speakers from ING group. They have been established since 1993, and have a lot of experienced and good speakers within their group. I enjoyed this presentation, and hopefully people who attended the presentation will have better understandings about women in Islam, how we honor our women, and how they have played such a great role in the world that we are living in.

By the way, all 30+ copy of Qur'ans that I brought, were all sold out!

Oh, want to see more photos of tonight's event? See at the photo gallery.

Wallahu ta'ala a'lam.

Every time when I went to Lessons in Islam Class, I thought, "Masha Allah, this class is awesome!" Then next time, the same thing again, "Wow, this time it's great!" It feels good every time when I stepped out from the class, a feeling of accomplishment, and feels like my burning desire has been fulfilled.

Anyway, this time we have Yasser Arafat as our Instructor. Masha Allah, Yasser Arafat, what can I say, he is a specialist when it comes to da'wah. He is a great da'ie masha Allah, and he has a lot of experiences in this field. By Allah mercy, Alhamdulillah, so far 25 non Muslims accepted the religion of Islam with his guidance. Yesterday he shared with us about some tips, importance, and guidelines on the topic of da'wah.

So here's the audio for you to hear. In sha Allah hopefully we can learn something from it, and act upon it as well.

Assalamu'alaykum Warahmatullah Wabarakatuh,

I went to Islamic Center of Nashville today, to join my fellow Muslim brothers in helping them out because we have a visit from West End Synagogue Youth group. It was a great event, Masha Allah. It feels great to see my fellow young Muslim brothers & sisters gave presentation about Islam, answered questions from the audiences and they were simply the ambassador of Islam in their own way. Some of MSA members were also there such as 'Atif, Mohsinah, and Nadia.

They arrived at ICN around 10am, and have a guided tour around the Islamic Center. Then we have breakfast together with hummus, pita bread, and some salads. After that some Muslim brothers and sisters gave a presentation about Islam. They talked about introductions of Islam, the five pillars, current issues around Islamic world as well as some misconceptions about the religion.

The presentation and questions and answers session took around an hour and a half. It was a very healthy discussion. Maybe for now there is no realistic solution on Israel - Palestine crisis, but I think maybe this event can play a small part of it. There are not many Jewish people in Malaysia, so here's my opportunity to learn more about them and to create the understanding with them as well.

There will be a visit from Islamic Center of Nashville youth to the West End Synagogue on January 11 2009. In sha Allah I am planning to go, because this will be my first time ever to go to synagogue. Overall, in my opinion, it was a great event and hopefully we can keep continue to build the bridges between Islam and other religions.

Assalamu'alaykum Warahmatullah Wabarakatuh;

I have subscribed to the Marriage Revolution newsletter quite for a while now. (Note: That doesn't mean I am looking for marriage soon though.) One of the topics discussed in the recent newsletter was about "Who is Mr. or Mrs. Right?" What are the criteria? What should I not look for?

Well, since many of us who are in the youth age, with many obstacles, hurdles and so confused of defining free mixing and finding a true love thru Halal way, I think this topic will be very interesting to think about. This is NOT from my opinion though. It's from Shaykh Yaser Birjas who I believe many of us know. So this is what he said.

Ladies should make a decision, "If a proposal comes to me, I'm going to take it seriously. So, they have made the decision that I am going to consider marriage right now. Even if I'm not necessarily ready for it, I'm going to consider it seriously. Not that I'm going to say "no" immediately. No. I will consider it."

So, who is Mr. Right or Mrs. Right anyway? Is there even such a thing as Mr. Right and Mrs. Right?

To answer this, we have to consider a dichotomy over here; How do you do your selection? The dichotomy over here is between the best selection and the right selection. So, it's between choosing the best person versus the right person.

Many people have in their minds an image of the best person - the best selection. This is usually an imaginary image that does not exist in reality or if it does, then it is so scarce that the chances of finding that best person are very slim, taking into consideration the environment, culture, location, place of origin, how many people are in the community and so on. So this is something that is very difficult to get.

However, the right person might be around the corner - maybe your closest neighbor, maybe your cousin, maybe someone related to you or unrelated to you. The whole point here is that the right person is the best person and not necessarily the other way around.

We understand this from Hadith Jabir radhiyallaahu 'anhu, where he said:

"My father died and left behind seven or nine daughters, and I married a woman. The Prophet said: 'Did you get married, O Jabir?' I replied, 'Yes.' He asked, 'Is she a virgin or a matron?' I replied, 'She is a matron.' He said, 'Why didn’t you marry a virgin girl so that you might play with her and she with you (or, you might make her laugh and she would make you laugh)?' I said, 'My father died, leaving seven or nine girls (orphans) and I did not like to bring a young girl like them, so I married a woman who can look after them.' He said, 'May Allah bestow His Blessing on you.'"

[Sahih Bukhari, Vol. 8, Book 75, #396]

The Prophet was asking this question because Jabir radhiyallaahu 'anhu was a young man and he expected that he would marry someone of his age. Jabir took a pragmatic approach to marriage.

But at the same time he made a commitment. Even though she was older than him and she was not maiden, when he was coming back home, he was getting so excited to meet his wife. Meaning he definitely had some passion for her. He chose the right person and this is the pragmatic approach and Allah will always put barakah, bi idhnillaah, if you open your heart sincerely to that person.

So again, there is the best person and there is the right person. And I'm telling you: the right person is the best person for you and not necessarily the other way round.

If you like her, then marry her.

If you like him, just marry him.

People, unfortunately, expect to know the person fully before they get married. Believe me, even if you extend the engagement to 2 or 3 years just to get to know each other, once you get married, the level of your expectations is going to change completely.

How do you explain then those who marry after a very long drawn out relationship - probably since being high-school sweethearts, college sweethearts and so on, and then after a few months or a couple of days, they divorce? What happened to them? That doesn't mean that love is not important in marriage. Yes, it is important, but the perception we have of love is totally different and that is another subject in itself.

Here again, we should think of the right person, not necessarily the best person. The best person might not be there anyway, but the right person might be just around the corner.

The recommendation again is: if you like her, just marry her; if you go and propose and you see good qualities in her - not perfect qualities - just marry her. If you like him, just like him, then the same thing: just marry him. That doesn't mean once you see her, you propose and then you just go through with the marriage. No.

You need to have some period of engagement where you can get to know each other. Consider this period like a test lab where you go and start working with each other to see how much compromise and adjustment you're going to be making after marriage. So you expect adjustments, you expect compromises, and you get ready for them.

Another suggestion for brothers and sisters, my humble and sincere advice:

Do NOT see too many people before making a decision.

Many brothers go around and they have probably seen 10, 15 or 20 ladies and they still haven’t made a decision. Ladies receive 10, 15 proposals and they are still waiting for the best person. The more you see, the more confused you will become, believe me. This is because you’ll always go back and say: Oh my God, if this character was here, this character was there, if she was like the other person I saw and so on.

So you're going to be evaluating all of these qualities to customize your selection. Even if you put all your selections on a piece of paper; if you have seen 10 women for example, or maybe you have received 5 proposals, and you put all the proposals on a piece of paper containing all the qualities, you’re going to get even more confused when you start saying, "Oh my God, if this was here, and this was in this column and so on, that would be the best person."

Well again, that person might not be there anyway. So don’t see too many people. If you see someone that you like, go for it and Allah will put love and mercy between your hearts after you get married, insha Allah.

So for the sisters again, if someone proposes to you and you think that you like the person - not necessarily love him, meaning he's okay - use that period to get to know each other. See how much compromise you're going to be making with one another and if it works out, well and good. Otherwise, there is no obligation. Still the recommendation is do not wait too long and do not see too many people. Love is very important but we need to understand it as a practical word, not just as a lip service. It's not just sentiments and emotions; it's more than that because even those who loved each other before marriage might end up with an ugly divorce.

What's the reason? It’s because once they got married, that's when the reality of marriage hit them. Before that it was all about "I love you and you love me and we're just going to have the perfect marriage" and so on. People tend to forget but when they get married, they are hit with the reality of marriage. Never make failure an option in your relationship.

If you see this person is the right person for you, you like the person, then open your heart and make a decision and may Allah bless your marriage.

Our team (Chaffin 113) qualified for the playoff round in the Vanderbilt Student Rec Center 3 on 3 Indoor Soccer Intramural after finished top of our league. We won 5 games, lost once. (5-0-1). Tomorrow will be our first playoff round. Hopefully everyone will play at their best and be the winner of the tournament.

Rosters:
Alan - Striker/Winger
Hasan - Midfield
Baba - Midfield
Dolah - Full Back/Winger
Amar - Defensive Mid/Center Back
Hubab - Defensive Mid/Center Back

Excellent lecture! Excellent quality! The Remedy for Whispering of Shaytan from Dr. Awadh Binhazim.

Dr. Awadh Binhazim, President of Olive Tree Education gave a nearly 3 hour talk on Islam during the Tennessee Psychological Association annual meeting at Nashville Airport Marriot this past Saturday.

EXCLUSIVE: Click to download the slides presentation.

Our next stop:
Olive Tree Education is organizing a presentation at the Tennessee Technical University campus in Cookeville, TN on Issues in the Muslim World – Women in Islam: Myth and Realities. It will be on Monday 11/17/08 at 6:00 to 8:00 pm. Click to visit the link. We are doing this in conjunction with Sister Maha Elgenaidi of the Islamic Networks Group (ING).

The da'wah survival in so-called the Bible Belt. I'm loving it.

Assalamu'alaykum Warahmatullah Wabarakatuh;

Actually, for the past few years I have lived in US, I am very amazed and feel very proud of the Muslim women - who stand strong in practicing one of the parts of their religion, i.e. dressing properly. I mean, for the man, maybe there are no obvious sign or signature that can tell he is a Muslim, but for the woman, Masha Allah, their faith can be recognized easily by their dressing, i.e. the hijab.

A Muslim woman walks down the street covered up from head to toe. There are many layers and loose clothing that may have the non Muslims very confused. Let say it's warm outside. (I just realized maybe this situation is not very applicable with Nashville weather currently but anyway,) most people are wearing shorts and t-shirts. Yet, we find the Muslim woman going against the norm and sticking out from the rest. In America, where one is "free" to do, say, or even wear anything, why would a free woman choose to dress this way?

It's a logical question.

Although the Muslim woman is indeed free - free to make her own choices, free to dress as she wills - she finds satisfaction in this way of life. She prefers to wear more rather than less. This is where she finds her dignity, her grace, and her value. She values her inner self, and as such would rather not put herself on display for others. This display is solely reserved for her husband and family members close to her such as her brother, father, uncle, etc. Her husband has earned the privilege of her beauty. He "earns" this right by committing to her and signing a marriage contract. Thus, her splendor is not something to be tossed around; there's an elite class of people who have the honor of seeing it. Her beauty is exclusively for a few and it is not to be enjoyed by others as she walks down the streets and malls.

Muslim woman is not to be toyed or exploited.

Yes, the Muslim women are hidden from most of the world. Oppressed and hidden, however, are far from synonymous. Yet, Muslim women wearing this hijab or covering the parts of their body are working as doctors, engineers, lawyers, nurses, and professionals all around the world. A mere covering does not prevent a woman from being an active and contributing member of her society in any way that she chooses. Rather, it gives others a chance to value her spoken word, her intellect, and her ideas over anything that she may or may not be wearing. The clothes that she wears does not diminish her independence or ability to think freely. Rather, it is when she thinks freely that she chooses to dress in such a fashion.

So, next time when we see a Muslim woman dressed properly and covered up, feel proud of her, and make prayers that she will stand strong in practicing her beloved faith.

Also for the non-Muslim, when you see a Muslim woman all covered up, don't be confused, sad, or disappointed. Know that this woman is indeed beautiful, inside and out. Know that she is content and at ease. Moreover, know that she would rather wear this than anything else.

Allahu ta'ala a'lam.

Us. In front of the back White House.
I went to DC last weekend, with some of my friends. We went there to celebrate the 'Eid Open House organized by Malaysia Students Department at DC. It was a good journey, overall. But I must said that I felt a little bit strange since my thoughts to Allahyarham Encik Rosllan was strong at that time. Last time when I was there, it was a moment to remember with Allahyarham. But now, many of the MSD officers are new, especially from JPA. For MARA, it still the same. I met Encik Ahmad Yeob, and saw Puan Huda.

Puan Ruziah, the JPA Education and Training Advisor and her family were very kind to let us sleep at their house. My warmest appreciation goes to her and the family, and not to forget, their maid, Bibik, who cooked Masha Allah very delicious Malay delicacies. Tell me how many of us in States, wake up in the morning, and already been served with some hot 'Nasi Lemak' on the table?

Actually that was my third time at DC. First time was 3 years ago when I was attending Muktamar. My second time was last 2 years, when I was stranded at DC en route to London. But, every time I came to DC, things that happened there would always remained in my mind. This time, lucky us, there was White House Spring Garden Tours. The tour is only opened to public 4 times in a year. So, me and my friends grabbed the opportunity to explore as much as we could inside the White House Garden. Although I already visited White House before, that was my first time to go inside the White House compound.

It was a good travel experience for me. I got to know more about my fellow juniors, especially those who were in the same car with me. I would like to take this opportunity to apologize to my fellow travelmates for any of my shortcoming.

Finally, pictures from DC have been uploaded at Photo Albums. Feel free to browse them.